Going it alone?

Recently I was reading the blog of another engaged woman, and I was a bit taken aback by one of her complaints. Let it first be known that I've never met this woman, and yes, I think it's a little weird that I was reading the blog of a stranger. It's like watching reality television but there are fewer train wrecks.

Anyway, the post that surprised me most was a light rant in which she noted that she was planning her entire wedding by herself because her maid of honor lived in another town and her bridesmaids were totally uninterested and her mother was three states away. Interestingly, many women responded to the post and said they were all in the same boat and they sympathized with her greatly.

Interestingly, very few women mentioned their husbands to be in their rants.

At first, I didn't understand what the big deal was--I know that a lot of people complain about wedding plans and how difficult weddings are and how much time it takes to plan a wedding, but that just has not been the case for us. The major details of our wedding were planned within a month of our engagement (and not because I had everything planned in my head beforehand--not that there's anything wrong with that--but I didn't).

I realized that the critical factor in our quick planning was B's active involvement. All of the advice he received was in the vein of, "You can have an opinion, but you're not allowed to voice it, and you should stay out of everything entirely." I definitely have my control-freak moments, but the thought of planning our wedding without B's active assistance never crossed my mind. And I, unlike some of the other girls, have also had the active assitance of my mother, which has been so nice.

My conclusion is that girls who feel like they're alone in their wedding planning need to recruit the assistance of the most obvious person--the other person who will be getting married that day.